A little bit about us

My husband and I have been married for 4 wonderful years. We’ve known each other for 6 years and we love each other very much.

We’ve been trying to conceive since September of 2007. Around April of 2008 we thought that we were pregnant since I was late, but it weren’t. We went to see my regular OB and he decided to run some tests. Everything was “ok” with me (one the outside with very minimal testiing) and so they decided to run some tests with Tom, they said that it was because treating a guy was “easier” than treating a girl.

So, Tom had a SA (semen Analysis) done. The day we got the results was one of the hardest days ever. The nurse was VERY cold and she read it to us as if we already knew what was going on.  The results were devastating, my main concern was to make sure that he was ok and that the sign of infection that they found didn’t mean anything.
We were sent to see a specialist. I chose the doctor since the one that they refered us to didn’t make things easy when it came to scheduling an appointment.
We found Dr.M, what a caring doctor he is. He talked to us about our choices and he ran the tests. He even called us the next day to make sure that we didn’t have any more questions and/or concern.

The day we got the results from the blood work was one of the worst days of our lives. Tom was diagnosed with Klinefelts. For me, all I cared about was to know that he was ok and that this problem was not going to affect his life. Luckly they have treatment for it and other than that he is very healty. I’m sure that Tom took this a little differently than I did. It’s still hard for him at times, but I’m sure that he knows that I love him very much and that nothing will ever change that.

So, what did we do know about trying to conceive? Well, we were sent to see Dr.S., aka, our RE (Reproductive Endocrinoligist). Our consult was ok and they gave us our options. We already knew what we would do so all we had to do was wait for my  period to come and we could start treatment. Well, my period didn’t come and we were kind of stuck waiting. After some meds my period came and we could start treatment.

Let the treatments begin.

At first they wanted to start slowly and they ordered Clomid for me to take. They started with 50mg. I took the pills and waited for my follicles to start growing. When it was time to go the our RE to check how many follicles I had and how big they were we got our first share of bad news. I only had one follicle and it was measuring small. They had me come back a couple of days latter to see if it would grow more but it didn’t. We had to cancel our first cycle.

Once again we found ourselves waiting to my period to start. Of course it didn’t. I was then given some meds to make it come. In the meantime, I called up the doctor and we talked about our options. I remember that they mentioned that my ovaries “appeared to be policystic” and I wanted to know the starts of Clomid and people that have Policystic Ovarian Syndrome. I was told that it’s a 50/50 chance of it working but that most women with PCOS respond better to injectables. I got the info about the meds with them and called my insurance to see what I could do.

I hit the jackpot. My insurance covers infertility treatment and drugs. I called my RE back and had them order the injectables. We ordered a medication called Follistim.

We really started treatment in January of 2009. They ordered more blood work and some X-ray test called HSG. It’s where they insert some dye inside of you to make sure your tubes are open and all.
The X-ray results came back ok, they did see a spot where they wanted me to have a full pelvic ultrasound to check and see. That came back normal. It was just a follicle that I was growing.
The blood test results confirmed what the RE suspected, I have Policystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS).

I started taking my injections on January 4th. I think that I started with 150ml of Follistim and then lowered it to 75ml 7 days later. I had a blood test on the 7th day and an ultrasound. I had 2 good size follicles and one that was a little smaller. I was to take two more days of Follistim at 75ml and then do the trigger shot (which makes me ovulate withing 48 hours) on the third day.

Our first IUI was performed on January 13th, 2009. I had 3 follicles and the numbers where good.  Now all I had to do was wait and see if it worked or not.
Before it was even time to take the pregnancy test I started spotting. 11 days after our insemination I new that it wasn’t a success.

Now we had to wait to my period to start and end so we can try again.
We went in to our RE to see if we could continue with treatment. Unfortunately, I had two cysts on my right ovary and I had to take Birth Control Pills to make them go away. This is the most bizare thing ever. Having to take BCP to try to conceive is just plain weird.

Two weeks later we were back at the RE’s office. The cysts were gone now we could start again.
I started my injections again on February 17th. Again at 150ml of Follistim for 5 days then 2 days at 75ml of Follistim and we went in for the ultrasound.
We did some blood work first thing in the morning then the ultrasound. This time we had a total of 4 follicles. Three were good sizes and one that was a little smaller.
Our second IUI was scheduled for February 28th at 10am. This time the numbers were even better than before, we were super happy.

Once again, we had to wait two weeks and see if it worked or not. Two weeks latter and I got a negative result. We were devastated.

Third time is a charm?

I again had left over cysts and had to start taking birth control pills to make it go away. This time they also put me on a medication called Metformin for the PCOS.
I started again with Follistim at 150ml for 10 days. This time my follicle counts were huge. I had 5 good follicles and 2 small ones. We were SUPER happy.
Our third IUI was scheduled for April 25th.  Our numbers were good even though they were a little lower than the last time.

I was SO scared of testing this time. I was convinced that it didn’t work. We even started to look more intensly into adoption.
I tested 10 days later (yes I know it was a little too early to test) and it was negative. I was devastated. I thought we were failed again.
The next day I was still pretty sad so I didn’t test in the morning. But after talking to Tom, I decided to test once I got home.

I was watching Oprah and then it happened. A positive came up on the pregnancy test. I was SO HAPPY. I called Tom at work and we both cried over the phone.
I then called my RE’s office right away and ran to the lab to get my blood work done. Just one thing, I forgot to let them know that I tested early.
My blood test came back, we were for sure pregnant. Now all we had to do was wait and see that our number would douple as they should.
They sure did. We were officially pregnant.

The best high of our lives!!!

We were finally pregnant. It was the most amazing feeling in the world.

We scheduled our first ultrasound with our RE to check how many babies I was having and to check for a heartbeat.
On May 27th at 9am we saw it. One little bean with a heartbeat. We didn’t hear it but we saw the heartbeating.
It was the most amazing thing we’ve ever seen. One of the best moments of our lives.

We were now released to our regular OB. We chose Dr.St., he is very peronal and sweet, he wanted to see us right away.
On June 1st we had our very first OB appt. Nothing unusual happened there. We just did some blood tests and other routine tests. No ultrasound for us.
Two weeks later I had some spotting and we ran in to get some answers. They did another ultrasound on June 16th. We got to see our little bean and we even got to heart the heartbeating.
Both Tom and I got emotional and were super happy that everything was ok.

Two weeks later we went back to see our OB Dr.St and all was still good. By this time had already anounced to the world that we were pregnant and we were super happy.
We took weekly pictures of my belly and measured it too.
We made plans, we purchased things and we were just waiting to see our little baby again.

We were now scheduled for our 12 wks ultrasound, where they would take some measurements and make sure nothing was wrong with our baby.

The worst low of our lives begin.

On July 9th we had our ultrasound. I had some spotting two day prior and I was told that it was normal.
I still had some very minimal spotting that day and I was scared to death.
During the ultrasound the technician was very quiet and when I asked her if she like her job she answered “sometimes”
Right there I knew something was wrong. She looked around for a while and when I asked “where’s my baby” she didn’t asnwer
Then she said it “I’m sorry but all I see is a baby measuring only 9 weeks and no heartbeat” Then she said that she was getting the doctor to come in.

She left us in the room for a minute, Tom and I cried and held each other………Tom kept saying, I hope they’re wrong. They have to be wrong.
The doctor came in and decided to do an internal untrasound. SHe looked around for a while, measured and then she said:
“I’m sorry but you are miscarring, your baby is only 9wks and there’s not heartbeat”

She then looked at us and said that it wasn’t our fault and that she didn’t know why God does that sometimes. Specially with us since we had to do an IUI and all.
She then said that I would have to call Dr.St and schedule a proceedure called D&C where they have to remove the demised fetus (as she called it) since my body wasn’t recognizing it.

Tom called Dr.St. right away, but he is on vacation and we had to see Dr.W instead.
July 9th was a Thursday and it was the worst day of our lives.  I was just completly devastated and wanted to hide from everyone.
Tom took over and made the necessary phone calls. I couldn’t bring myself to talk to anyone, all I could do was cry, cry , cry.

The following day I got a call from Dr.W, unfortunately he couldn’t get me in for surgery that day, I had to wait until monday.
My parents got  their things together and headed our way. Even though I wanted to be left alone, I knew that I couldn’t do that to my mother, she had to be with me even if I couldn’t be with her.

My surgery was scheduled for Monday late in the afternoon. I was to go see Dr.W early in the morning before surgery. I was to not eat anything as of midnight the day before and I could only have clear liquids until 10am on monday morning. We saw Dr.W. in the morning and he explained how surgery was going to be and the risks. He also said that again this was not our fault and that it did not mean that it was going to happen again. Our chances of having a full term baby next time would not decrease before of this loss. He explained that we would grieve for weeks and that it was normal and that once we were ready we could start trying again. He only suggested that we wait a couple of cycles so my body can heal.

We had to be at the Hospital two hours prior to the surgery. There we were at 2:45pm. Everyone at the hospital was super nice. They all treated me with the upmost respect and care. My anesthesiologyst was super nice and funny, all the nurses were super nice and caring. My doctor Dr.W was late and they were not very happy about that but i didn’t care, I was in no hurry.

After the surgery I was in the recovery room for about 1 hour or so and then they had Tom come in and gave him instructions.
Dr.W said that I had a little too much bleeding but nothing to be concerned with. I was sent home the same day.
I was able to eat later that night, mom made some chicken soup and it was really good. All I did was sleep, sleep, sleep.

The next morning I woke up a little sore and crampy, so I took one of the pain pills they prescribed me. It took the pain away really fast, but it made me really drowzy.
My parents were going back home that tuesday and I was planning on staying in bed as much as I could.
Later that night the pain was back. I didn’t want to take the pain killer because it had made me so drowzy, so I took some Aleve. It doesn’t work as fast……or as much. But I was able to go back to sleep and the pain decipated.

Planning on going back to work the next day. This is it, life has to go on……it’s just hard.

Baby we love you

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s